Reminder: TOP’s Star Diary series is written in his point of view, as if he is writing a journal entry.
I’m starting to feel the horror of war from filming Into the Gunfire. A bomb explodes just a few steps in front of me. It’s a different feeling from filming a drama.
Eye expression is important. I have to empty myself and convey student soldier lieutenant Oh Jang Bum to the audience. I think all the times I stood on stage as Big Bang is helping with my eye expression in acting. It’s because there were many times when I would convey my emotion to the audience with my eyes on stage. Conveying my own emotions to others in this way is what gives me the most joy.
On this movie set, I’m the youngest. I’ve started to get to know my seniors. They are carrying and guiding me, who knows nothing, who is ridiculous. Filming with all men is fun. I get envious of my seniors and the the stability they find with their families. I hadn’t ever thought of marriage before. Seeing my seniors, I’ve started to really think that I want to get married. Is it because I’m lonely?
But work is still first. I want to lose my mind in my work when I’m young. I want to go with the flow. Freedom is the most important thing that I’m made up of. I think filming this movie has increased my sensitivity. My personality has changed a lot too. Should I say that I’ve learned how to see through a child’s eyes. On the other hand, I feel like my inner self is slowly growing. Hanging out with my seniors is starting to make me more sensible. Ah, I don’t want to become sensible…